8 Classic Stereotypes of a Texan (PS, You’re Wrong… For the Most Part)
by Audrey Swanson
“Texans constantly think, breathe, eat and worship football.”
Well, yeah, it’s a freaking awesome sport and one of the most fun to watch. But we do other things, too, like work and go to restaurants and exercise and travel. Although, these things just so happen to become even more fun if the Cowboys are on in the background. Jafeel?
“Every Texas girl’s hair is big enough to hold all her secrets.”
Don’t get us wrong, we like volume, but the huge hair trend that Texas seems to be known for is actually faux. We’ve got straight hair, curly hair, short hair, long hair, etc., just like every other state. (But ours does all look fantastic.)
“Anything fried is a Texan’s main food group.”
Nooo, no, no no no. I mean, sure, the Texas State Fair is host to one of the biggest fried foods competitions around, but we have tons of healthy options, too. Central Market, Whole Foods, Trader Joe’s, Sprouts and outdoors farmers’ markets are easy to find, and so are healthful fast food dining concepts like Start, a drive-through, low-cal eatery here in Dallas.
“Every Texan throws ‘y’all’ into sentences like sailors throw in the F-bomb.”
To be totally honest, ‘y’all’ is easier to say than ‘you guys,’ or any other variation of the collective pronoun (whoa, bringing out the 7th grade English teacher in myself for this one). But, simplicity isn’t everything. With people moving to Texas from all over the country and world, we’ve got a solid mix of ‘y’all,’ ‘you guys,’ ‘you all,’ and other varieties that pretty much everyone here uses.
“Texans all live on ranches and our main mode of transportation is a giant pickup truck, or a horse.”
Seriously? Not real life. We have a few of the largest cities in the States here in Texas, Dallas being one of the fastest growing of them all. Transportation by means of horses is a thing of the past (unless maybe you’re in Fort Worth), and while pickups are cool and all, it’s not the only vehicle trekking around our state.
“It’s a common known fact that Texas isn’t an American state, but its own country.”
Okay, fine, we can be a little cocky! But we don’t think we’re our own nation, and all those murmurs about seceding are just silly little jokes… for the most part. Just because we’re proud to be from an all-American, kickass, incomparable, red-blooded state doesn’t mean we’re breaking away from the other 49.
“Whataburger is a way of life that all Texans have faithfully chosen.”
See the above item on fried food. Ew. While Whataburger has made its hefty stamp on Texas’s identity (the Honey Butter Chicken Biscuit is kind of amazing), not all of us claim it as our one and only.
“Luke Bryan, Miranda Lambert, Brooks and Dunn, and country music in general is the soundtrack to Texas life.”
Negative, ghostrider. Country is really great and all, but we’re eclectic like cuh-razy. Sure, we’re home to some country superstars, but the likes of Beyonce, Usher and Nick Jonas are also from the Lonestar State… So you KNOW we’ve got a solid variety of jams around here.